Saturday, December 25, 2004

This is one of my favorite Christmas Poems of all times..

'Twas the Night Before Christmas
(or A Visit from St. Nicholas)
by Clement Clarke Moore

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the housenot a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,while visions of sugar plums danced in their heads.And Mama in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap.

When out on the roof there arose such a clatter,I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.Away to the window I flew like a flash,tore open the shutter, and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snowgave the lustre of midday to objects below,when, what to my wondering eyes should appear,but a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.More rapid than eagles, his courses they came,and he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
"Now Dasher! Now Dancer!
Now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! On, Cupid!
On, Donner and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch!To the top of the wall!Now dash away! Dash away!Dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,when they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky so up to the house-top the courses they flew,with the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roofthe prancing and pawing of each little hoof.As I drew in my head and was turning around,down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,and his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,and he looked like a peddler just opening his pack

His eyes--how they twinkled! His dimples, how merry!His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,and the beard on his chin was as white as the snow.The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.He had a broad face and a little round belly,that shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,and I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.A wink of his eye and a twist of his headsoon gave me to know I had nothing to dread

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,and filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk.And laying his finger aside of his nose,and giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.But I heard him exclaim, 'ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Day 2

Today is my second day and jet lag is trying to catch up with me. I slept the whole afternoon. Grabe ang ginaw parang nasa aircon na todo ang thermostat pero di mo mahanap ang switch. Naka heater na kami pero super lamig pa rin. But I can't complain Im really having a great time. I met up with my Brother in law at around 7pm. We had dinner and we went to different stores. Philbert bought a new pair of pants as for me I just bought a new bag from Victoria's Secret. Then we went home. When we got home dumating na rin si Mama from the airport. I don't know for some reason sometimes I love her to death but sometimes I just can't being around her. I guess she can be too domineering at times lalo na when it comes to what I eat and how I should eat.

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Day 1

After one week of preparing and packing and last minute shopping. Im finally here and It's been great. I missed my sisters and it really feels great to be here. Grabe!Ibang iba pala talaga dito. This is a whole new place and I have a lot of exploring to do. One thing that is just so sad is I miss my kids. This is what I did as soon as I got off the plane..We went to get our luggage then customs then I saw my sister Rhanesa. Haayy.. I missed her so much. I haven't seen her in 2 years. Then I finally met her fiance Geof. Then we went to eat out at Sanamluang a very popular Thai Restaurant. Then I went to see my lola and some cousins then it was time to head for my sister's new home.WOW!! it was such a beautiful house.. Di sya apartment lang.. tipong 3 big rooms tapos 3 t & b's and little garden. I love it.. I'll post photos later on.

Saturday, November 27, 2004


My sister Grishan and her son Brox left the Philippines to embark on a new journey. A trip to the United States. I know i'll miss them both so much but in my heart I know that this is what she wants to do and I'm happy for both of them.I'll see them in 10 days.Which reminds me that I have to start packing for our trip.

Andie's yaya gave birth today.. Initially Yaya Bing (Joshwa's yaya) thought na she had appendicities (sp?) kasi she was vomitiing and she couldn't stand up.That's why she wanted to be brought to the hospital. When they arrived at the hospital. Dun na lang nalaman that she was pregnant.Kasi she kept saying may lalabas na. Initially ayaw nya pa umamin na buntis sya. But when they did a urinalysis. Wala na talagang kawala di na sya nakapag sinungaling.

When Yaya Bing called me I was in Greenbelt attending a despedida for a friend. Punta agad ako sa Pasay General Hospital .I didn't even know she was pregnant. .. I asked her if she was pregnant last month coz someone told me that she looked pregnant. She denied it.

Apparently she told the nurse at the hospital she didn't want the baby but didn't have a choice natakot daw mag pa-abort (which was good).I don't know what will happen kung aalagaan ba nya yung baby or ipapauwi nya sa province with her mom. One thing is for sure she can expect a very loonnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggg sermon that she'll never hear the end of. I know the question that will always be asked how could you not know?I guess I just took her word for it.

Nakakainis pa is they ask you to buy na sobra dun sa gagamitin nila. Saka di pa sabay sabay ang bibilhin sa pa-unti unti na pagbili sa napakadaming reseta inabot na ng 3k.. Di pa kasama yung babayaran sa hospital. Buti na lang I have money with me what If wala naku po kawawa naman sya..

I felt guilty because I always take her to the grocery and the mall whenever I have to do some shopping. Surprisingly I'm not angry at her.. I guess I feel more of a concern. Had she told me that she was pregnant. I would have helped her prepare for the baby. Lucky for her I kept most of Joshwa's baby clothes and things so puede ko pa sya pahiramin..

Monday, November 15, 2004

Spirits 2004 & Ultimate Frisbee

I had the pleasure of being able to watch an international tournament last weekend. It was THE BOMB! I had a great time... It really made me miss playing frisbee. The level of play was EXCELLENT & AMAZING to say the least.I have great pictures and I'll be posting them soon. One amazing part was not during the game but after the game when the local and foreign players were willing to exchange jerseys. That was amazing.. There was this great SAMBA band after the final game and most of the people were dancing and it was so cool..

Ultimate Frisbee is really one great sport.Kahit bano ako dyan I'll really stick to that. It's not just a sport its really a community and your team is really like your family.. I love that Game.Iba yung excitement.. Iba yung level of adrenalin..

Saturday, November 06, 2004


Thanks so much for the kind words that you shared with me.It made me feel so much better.
Everything seems quiet for now. Which makes me nervous? Have a great weekend.. Thanks
so much for always finding the time to read my rants and raves about anything and everything.

Thursday, October 28, 2004

A Poem By Robert Frost

I totally love this poem. It was the first poem that I memorized because I loved it so much and not because it was assigned to me. What really struck me was the last stanza of this poem.

Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening
Robert Frost
Whose woods these are I think I know,
His house is in the village though.
He will not see me stopping here,
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer,
To stop without a farmhouse near,
Between the woods and frozen lake,
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake,
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep,
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

Favorite Quote

I haven't blogged in a week.. Let me just leave you with you this favorite quote:

**I am nothing special; of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough.**

Noah Calhoun
The Notebook

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Happy Birthday to Me..

I celebrated my 28th Birthday today.. I just went to the Zoo with the Kids and my husband plus our two household angels.. Then it was off to the mall for a bit of shopping. Its sort of a tradition between us when Its my birthday I give Philbert something like a shirt or something that I know he will use. Then we ate dinner then we went home. We all had a good time.

I feel blessed because I really do appreciate the blessings that I have. To be honest I really do know who my friends are.. The greatest gift that I received for my birthday is the blessing that God loves me so much and He will never let me down. Thanks so much to everyone who greeted and kept me in their thoughts during this special day.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Andie & Joshwa's Photos

Here are some photos of Andie & Joshwa

My Little Lady

Ready For Bed

Say Cheese


Monday, October 11, 2004

If I Ain't Got You

I really love this song.. Super!!!! Baduy ba sabihin na para kay Philbert yung song.. Anyway, blog ko naman. Paunlakan nyo na lang ako :)

by Alicia Keys

Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power, yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things

define what’s within
And I been there before but that life’s a bore,

so full of the superficial


Some people want it all,but I don’t want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby, if I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings, some just want everything
But everything means nothing if I ain't got you, yeah
Some people search for a fountain
The promise is forever young
(You know) Some people need three dozen roses
And that’s the only way to prove you love them
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
With no one to share with, no one who truly cares for me


Some people want it all, but I don’t want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby, if I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings, some just want everything
But everything means nothing if I ain't got you, you, you
Some people want it all, but I don’t want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby, if I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings, some just want everything
But everything means nothing if I ain't got you, yeah
If ain't got you with me baby, ohh, ooo
Say nothing in this whole wide world don’t mean a thing
If I ain't got you with me baby x2

Saturday, October 09, 2004


After a week of craziness, I’m glad that this week is over. I just want it to be December already. I’m so excited about this trip. I feel bad that I can't take Joshwa with me. As much as I want to but because he has so many sensory issues like ear sensitivity, claustrophobia and hyperactiveness. His therapist feels that he is not up for the flight yet.. At least he has a new sister to accompany him when he goes to his grandparents for the holidays.

I was blog hopping and I saw something that struck me. Someone was saying that she wished she could have reached out to me because she understands me. Wow... That is so cool. I really thought she didn’t like me after what I did who would right? It is something that I have been including in my prayers.

Forgiveness... I have done a lot of stupid things to so many people I always prayed to God that somehow they will forgive me. I don't expect them to talk to me or anything. I just always pray that God will always be good to them and bless them with a forgiving heart.

I’ve been attending this cell group every Monday and it has been so amazing. I see so many changes in me... The important thing that I have learned is to TRUST. I always thought that I wasn't worthy anymore. But God loves me so much that I feel that he made me a new person. He taught me to trust in him. When things don't go well I just say a short prayer and somehow God makes me see that he's in control of my life. Because as much you want to run your life without God somehow it doesn’t work out and we feel, angry, afraid and frustrated. I know I did...

I think that's where my depression started to come in. I wasn't in control and I blamed myself. A good example is like driving a car. I just gave the steering wheel to God and I'm his backseat driver. A classic example in my life is my husband. We used to fight a LOT as in shouting matches and breaking of things and almost walking away. But with God's help he taught me to forgive the sins and forget the past and now we don’t fight at all. Yes we argue but we don't fight anymore.

When I found out that Rio Diaz-Cojuangco passed on. I said to myself she's with the Lord now. She's a classic example of loving and following God inspite of not despite of. I’m just so glad that God gave me the peace of mind that I've long been searching for. Eventhough ang daming problems somehow di na ako tensed kasi di ako pababayaan ni God and I say AMEN to that

Monday, October 04, 2004

The Notebook

I watched this wonderful, beautiful film yesterday knowing absolutely nothing about it and was totally captivated by its softness, delicacy and truth-a combination not often seen in American movies. I saw no crime, no bloodshed and no guns but the human drama that was played out before our wet eyes was that which we can all relate to through all the convolutions of human existence.

I don't watch movies that I don't think I'll like; therefore, in the first minute I know that this is going to be watchable and if it is, then I have no eye for mistakes-if the movie has swept me in I am its captive and I will care nothing for possible mistakes. If I'm not mistaken the first scene was that beautiful image of Noah rowing a boat in the darkening evening on one of those lugubrious South Carolina rivers-I was hooked! I was not disappointed until I saw the ending credits and I have nothing but superlatives for the acting, the script, the camera work, as well as the direction. Just the staging with those beautiful classic cars rolling around rural Carolina should be enough to win over any naysayer.

This was a very heartbreakingly beautiful love story. I feel that it's one of the best films/stories I've ever seen. And, I feel that the actors did a very good job portraying their characters. Ryan Gosling and Rachel Mc Adams are both really attractive,sensual and endearing as the young couple. Their story is both beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time, at the end. I wish that I could find someone who loves as Noah did, with every fiber of his being; never giving up hope that his true love would return to him. Only to have to lose her over and over, day after day, as age and an unforgiving disease steal her mind/memories away. James Garner and Gena Rowlands are superb!

Im not ashamed to say that I was crying while I was watching the movie. I was so moved by the movie. I want a love like that. I really hope that Philbert and I will grow old together. I hope that no one dies ahead of the other. I hope we both die at the same time..

Thursday, September 30, 2004

My New Blog

I love my blog's new look. I couldn't have done it without this sweet friend of mine.Thanks so much for my dear friend Jeanny for helping me out. You are my fairy blog-mother.
I can't thank you enough. God Bless.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004


Andrea or Andie as I call her is my new daughter she's 4 years old.. I'm still trying to figure out kung ano ang second name nya. Gusto nga din palitan yung Andrea kaya lang sanay na sya dun. She's a truly blessing to us coz I remember trying to get pregnant na pero di na ako mabuntis according to the doctor I have secondary inferitility tapos nasabayan pa ng remark ng remark ng MIL ko na kaya ka di mabuntis kasi nabalutan na ng taba ang ovaries mo.
I was so depressed. So I prayed to God..I really want a daughter. Lo and behold this friend calls me up and asks me gusto ko daw ba si Andrea. Akala ko nagbibiro sabi ko sure sabi nya dadalhin daw nya sa house and she wasn't joking the next day dala na nya sa house ko ang dala nya lang is yung damit na suot nya and one extra dress and one underwear. So taranta talaga ako mag shopping ng underwear and clothes for her. Then pinasok ko sya sa school sa katabi ng bahay namin. As for the mom di na sya bumalik sa house ko, Now when she wants to talk to her daughter she just texts me to call her. Im now trying to find a lawyer to help me with the adoption process. Hopefully magka ayos na kami nitong lawyer na kausap ko.
We are not rich.. Therapy pa nga lang ni Joshwa mabigat na. But I've always believed that God will always provide kung will nya na Andie is for us then Im sure he'll help us na pagkasyahin kung ano ang andyan. We love her so much we could never imagine what our life would be without her.
Mayroon din nagsabi na baka mahati ang pagmamahal namin kay Joshwa and Andie.I don't think so. Velvet my friend once told me that a mother love is so great that it can be divided into so many parts and yet pantay pa rin. Ive really realized na totoo talaga yan. Based din sa kuento ng mga iba ko bang friends.

I've always believed that adoption is one of the highest forms of unconditional love although not everyone is meant to adopt kasi di lahat kaya magmahal ng di nya kadugo. I learned this lesson from the Hubby ni CG and Mother Gem.
I know that the threat is always there na bumalik yung nanay na bawiin yung anak nya. For me okay lang yun basta alam ko talagang aalagaan na nya and mabibigyan na nya magandang kinabukasan. I will not say na di sya masakit. It will be very painful i hope that never happens but if it does then maybe she wasn't meant for us.

Thursday, September 16, 2004


Today is just one of those happy days.. Finally nakakuha na rin kami ng visa. After 3 days of cramming it finally paid of. Ganun pala talaga yun.
Di mo talaga alam kung hinanahanap sa yo at kung ano itatanong sa inyo..
Eto ang kuento ko. ..
Dumating kami ng 1:30PM. Dapat earlier pa kasi 2 PM ang appointment kaso naman umulan malakas bumaha pa. Pagdating namin dun pumunta kami sa Pavillion sa Window 1 tapos tinignan yung photo dun sa visa application. Phil and Brox's photo were rejected kasi pangit pala sa digi photo masyadong maliwanag. But just the same binigyan na kaming lahat ng number. After 10 minutes bumalik na sila pina barcode na yung application form tapos punta na kami sa window B tapos tinignan ang application form para malaman na okay na sya. Pumunta na kami sa waiting area
that was the longest 1 1/2 hours of my life.
Tagal maghintay pero kakaaliw yung mga tao. Mayroon dun bank manager sya daming dala and yet na deny sya. Kinabahan ako dun..Kami sya nga nadeny madaming papeles paano kaya kami. Then mayroon group of kids sa likod namin 8 kids to be exact sibblings pala sila. Kasama parents nila. Nabigyan sila ng visa. Imagine 10 sila kasi pati parents ata nila kumuha. Wish na lang ako sana dun kami mapunta. Just my luck dun kami napunta. In fairness.. Cute sya.
Here are some of the questions na tinanong sa amin baka sakaling nag hahanda na din kayo pumunta sa US baka makatulong sa inyo.Eto ang dialogue namin:
Consul: Whats the purpose of your visit?
Me: To attend the wedding of my sister.
Consul: Where might that be?Me: In Los Angeles
Consul: (turns to Philbert and asks) what is your line of work?
Phil: Im in Information Technology, (then proceeds to discuss his line of work technical na sya so di ko naintindihan)
Consul: Do you have plans to work there?
Phil: No, because i know that IT's are already being outsourced from other countries.
Consul: Yeah that's true IT's in the US go to other countries to get work.
Consul: What about you? where are you working?
Me: Im working for our family business
Consul: Which side?
Me: My dad owns the company
Consul: What kind of business are you in?
Me: I discussed kung ano line of work and biz namin
Consul: (to Phil) What does your brother do in the US?
Phil: I'm not really familiar with his line of work there.All I know is that he is an accountant
Consul: What does your sister do in the US?
Me: She's working for a home care agency as Payroll Assistant.
Consul: (to Phi)l: Will it be hard for you to get a vacation from your boss?
Phil: Not really because December is really a slow month.
Consul: How long are you planning to stay?Me: 30 days max
Consul: Want to show me anything.. Ngek di ko alam kung ano ipapakita ko sa dami. If there was such a thing as being over prepared we were it. Name it we have it. Pictures, properties, car registrations and etc. Pero naman di sa amin yun sa tatay ko.
Me: Here's the wedding invitation and the letter of support from my dad and cert from the bank. Because he'll be financing the trip.
Consul: Do you have Joshwa's birth certificate? How old is he?Me: He is 3 years old and I hand him the birth certificate.
Consul: Okay then everything's great.( He hands us the yellow paper)Go to the pavillion then pay for the courier's fee to have your visa delivered. We usually give single entry visa's since you're a first timer.
That was it.. I couldn't even believe it till we paid for the courier's fee.. Ganun katagal bago nagsink in. Di ko alam kung suerte lang at nakakuha kami. Palagay ko will of the Lord ito.. We literally stormed the heaven's with prayers. My mom asked all her priest friends to pray for us. Ako naman I kept going to to make a prayer request and I asked the my tita's cell group to also pray for us. It worked, it really worked.. Im just so happy.. .

Friday, September 10, 2004

What A Day!!!

Today was a day like no other. . It was one of the worse mommy days. It's the day where I had to rush to the emergency room to bring my son in for treatment.

Eto ang sequence of events:

It was 8:45 AM Joshwa's yaya just called me..

Bing: Hello , Ate Leirs nasugat si Joshwa.
Leirs: Bakit ano nangyari?
Bing: Ate kasi si Joshwa umakyat sa kuarto tapos nung tinatawag
ko biglang sinarado pinto.
Leirs: O tapos ano nangyari
Bing: Tapos pagsara nya naipit daliri nya ayaw tumigil ng dugo.
Natanggal ata kuko nya.
Leirs: Mag ready na kayo.. Uwi na ako punta na tayo ng Makati Med ngayon na.

I was shaking I could barely walk to the jeepney stop. As soon as I saw his wounded pinky finger dun na talaga sya nag sink in.

Pagdating namin sa emergency room they immediately ushered us inside. I was trying to compose myself pero talagang I was panicking na. . The doctors only had one verdict Joshwa had to be confined. Kasi they wanted to remove the nail. Imagine that it shattered like a broken glass pero nakakabit pa rin sa finger nya. They wanted to remove it baka maging source of infection.

So there I was praying silently na sana wag na sya ma-confine.Eventhough may insurance si Joshwa semi-private lang ang coverage namin. Pero in my heart I know that I have to trust in the will of the Lord. Nahihiya ako sa anak ko na ni wala man lang akong pambayad kung ma hospital sya para upgrade yung room nya.. I know mababaw pero as a mom gusto ko sana the very best para sa anak ko.

Pero still inayos ko pa rin lahat.. Then pagbalik ko sa ER para sunduin ko na si Joshwa dumating na yung orthopedic surgeon nya. Then Lo and Behold he told me na di na kailangan magpaconfine si Joshwa.Apparently, In special kids mahirap daw i-sedate kasi daw di ma predict ang effect. Yung iba daw matagal magising yung iba naman nag wear off agad.

Kaya ayun nilagay ng glue yung kuko nya na naiwan. Para pag tumubo na yung kuko nya itutulak na nya yung patay na kuko palabas. Para di nya magalaw ang ang sugat may bandage ang buong right hand nya.

Masaya lang ako na okay na si Joshwa. Yun lang naman talaga importante di ba?

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Da Vinci Code

I just finished reading the The Da Vinci Code and from someone who doesnt really read suspense books.. Here's my review:

It's good, damn good. The Da Vinci Code has all the right ingredients to create a massive market share of the fiction . The characters are believable, the fictional premise intriguing, and it made a really good analogy about the catholic church and the search for the Holy Grail.

You all deserve a quick plot summary. Know that there can't be one here -- the book is a thriller and details will destroy it for you. I just had to delete the next 250 or more words I'd written, because I realized it would destroy the suspense in the book. I'd defined the Holy Grail in terms of Celtic, Moor (pick your pagan) traditions. Then I wrote about the myths surrounding the Knights Templar, the persecution of Jews, the relationship between Jesus and his love, Mary Magdalene, and more. What I can tell you without ruining the book, is that this book takes myth and reality and combines it in just the right way. He appears to be right on target with his many of his conclusions, and while the book is "fiction", one can't help but believe much of it. Brown doesn't insist you believe him, in fact, he's almost apologetic about how strange and unusual his conclusions may sound. In a subtle way, he warns the reader that everyone is allowed their own belief system and whatever gives someone spiritual comfort should be respected. But Using Will and Ariel Durant's The History of Civilization, Francis and Joseph Gies' Women in the Middle Ages, and Barbara Walker's The Women's Encyclopedia of Myths and Secrets to confirm Brown's facts, I learned that when he puts two and two together, it's amazing what he comes up with.

This book will have what is probably an unintentional effect. The Da Vinci Code counteracts other best sellers. Brown presents an intellectual and fact-based suspense thriller that will hopefully start a trend toward debunking the misquoted myths and errant Biblical interpretations .One can't help but wonder when the fanatics of the religious right will rise up in defense of the End Times series and call for a boycott of The Da Vinci Code.

As for me it doesnt anymore what other people think of the book. It answered a lot of questions.
I love it.. I love it.. I love it

Monday, September 06, 2004



I have and want to:
1) lose, lose, lose...a lot of weight!
2) start playing badminton
3) pay the bills.. and find a way to get the money to pay for my bills
4) be a better me..

Sunday, September 05, 2004

Married Life Realizations

Yesterday as we were patching things up and I was asking Hon if he had anything else to say.He told me what's the use di ka naman sumusunod sa akin. At first I was in denial then denial changed to defensiveness.I don’t like it that I have to give up control. Minsan nga inaasar ko pa yung kaibigan ko pag sinasabi nya sa akin na sumusunod sya pag may sinasabi asawa nya. I’m like whaaatt!!! I just got married but I didn't plan to surrender my life to anyone else.

Then kanina I was talking to my friend she was complaining about her SIL. Tigas daw ng ulo ayaw sumunod sa asawa baka daw di nya mahal kasi kung mahal mo papasakop ka. Then we started to discuss submissiveness. Then It hit me.. That's a trait I dont have.

Naisip ko tuloy marami sana kaming problems na naiwasan namin kung sumunod lang ako. I realized that I did surrender my life to him the day I said I do.

I also realized that a happy marriage is more than the "I Do" on the wedding day. It is hard work and can be a lengthy process. Believe me, no successful marriage is arranged in heaven. God made men and women capable of making marriage work!!! This does not come effortless.

Many of us enter marriage with impossible dreams and unrealistic expectations.
No one could tell us about the flaws in our choice of a spouse. We were in love and our love would surmount all obstacles.

Two months into the marriage and reality will start to set in. You start to discover a lot of things both good and bad. The in-laws that you thought you love will make your marriage MORE complicated.

Courtship and marriage may begin with romantic love, but for a long-lasting relationship, romantic love must be complemented by maturity, trust and respect. Special personal qualities are crucial for a happy relationship: commitment, sensitivity, generosity, consideration, loyalty, responsibility, trustworthiness.

Romance and mutual attraction are important for a happy marriage, and should not be overlooked. But you cannot live on love, no matter how romantic that sounds.
Romantic love is not enough when you and your spouse lack what it takes to sustain a relationship as intimate and as spiritual as marriage.

According to M. Scott Peck’s book the Road Less Traveled, Love is not a feeling it’s a commitment. When you tell someone that I love you. You tell that person that I commit myself to you. That’s why I’m sad that people seem to take that word lightly.

Couples need to cooperate, compromise, and follow through with joint decisions. They have to be resilient, accepting, and forgiving. They need to be tolerant of each other's flaws, mistakes and peculiarity

Marriage is a reflection of our relationship with God. We submit to our husbands, they submit to Christ and Christ submits to the Father. If we have no respect for our husband’s authority, then we have no respect for God’s authority. Sometimes God doesn’t do things the way we think they ought to be done, same as our husbands, huh. Sometimes we have to hang on because the ride gets bumpy. But, somehow we always have a sense that God’s having everything in control is OK while our husbands don’t have the foggiest notion and we have to usurp their authority with our own. Look out if they don’t do it our way.

We can submit to our husbands by letting them pick the restaurant or discipline the children the way they see fit. When our husband makes a decision, we can support it and stand up for it. If we give the role as the spiritual head of household to our husband, we might be surprised to find out that he takes control of this very well. Maybe it’s our way that isn’t working that good. After all, the sixties have been over for a while, but there are still a lot of ways this world belongs to men. Maybe, it takes a man to deal with it.

Here are some of the scriptures that I found that is related to submissiveness.

1Corintians 11:3

Now I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.

Ephesians 6:7
Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men.

Ephesians 5:21
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Saturday, September 04, 2004


Sorry for not updating this blog.. We actually went through a Marital Crisis last week. There were so many issues that came up that caught me off guard. Then we talked about most off the things that happened in the last couple of days. But as we were resolving things. He dropped a bombshell on me that I didn't expect. He then told me that he really didn't want to migrate at all. He loves his job and here and can't see himself starting again.I told him not to say NO right away kasi matagal pa naman kami ma-approve so it might take us a few years before we can leave.But in the end someone had to give in and it was me. Haaayyyy!! I hope I can change his mind.. Say in 10 years.

Sunday, August 29, 2004

My Family Lay Out..

Yung page na ito na nakalagay pinapakita lang ako at si Philbert bilang magulang. Kung mapapansin nyo sunod sunod yung sequence mula nung baby pa si Josh hanggang sa ngayon. Natutuwa lang ako sa nakikita ko kasi lumalaki na talaga ang baby ko.

My Latest Scrapbook Work

I just wanted to post my latest work.. I'm may not be a good scrapbooker. But I love being a scrapshopper. Whats the point of this entry wala lang.. I just wanted to share my work.. Pinahaba ko pa..

Friday, August 27, 2004

Great News!

Tinawagan na akong nung foundation na papasukan ni Joshwa. Nasabi ko lang ay Haaay salamat.. Kasi ang tagal ko din syang hinintay mga isang taon din yun. Pero okay lang kasi nasa last stage na kami ng application. Assessment na ni Joshwa sa Tuesday.. Maghanda na daw ng 3k para sa assessment fee. Tapos pag papasok na sya magbibigay na kami ng 5k na bond. Nasabi ko na lang sa sarili ko. Parang di foundation ang laki pa rin ng ilalabas. Pero natuwa naman ako dun sa feedback na binigay sa akin kasi daw okay daw talaga yung foundation.. O sya ano pa nga ba. Kaysa naman maglabas ako ng 30K a month( yan yung going rate nila pinaka minimum pa yun) di namin kaya. Baka di na kami kumain at sa kalsada na kami tumira. Mabait talaga ang Diyos sa amin. Di nya kami pinapapabayaan.

Kaya lang ang malungkot na balita pag nagsimula na kami sa foundation kailangan ko na bitawan yung ABA nya ngayon kasi ABA din ang pinaka approach nung foundation. Buti na lang matagal ko na sinabi na temporary lang itong kina Teacher Mavic masay ako at nainitindihan naman nila kami. Sana lang magtuloy tuloy yung improvement ni Joshwa. Maski pa may bagong center na sya lilipatan tapos bagong Teacher na ang hahawak sa kanya

Dahil foundation yung papasukan nya subsidized ang rate ng therapy nya. Malaki din ang matitipid namin. Marami na kaming puedend gawin dun sa matitipid namin. Puede na sya mag school next year kasi luluwag na din ang schedule nya. Syempre pa puede ko na uli pagbigyan ang isa sa mga luho ko may pangbili na ako ng scrapbook materials ko..Naku paktay lo na naman ako sa asawa ko buti na lang di sya nagbabasa ng blog ko.

Thursday, August 26, 2004

Marauder's Map Quiz

Which Harry Potter Marauder Are You?

You are loyal and protective of those you care about, but have a quick temper when an injustice is made, especially when that injustice was done by a Slytherin. You have a wild streak to you, but life has taught you what is really important.

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Thoughts on Migrating

I have been reading all about migration this past few days with great interest. We decided to start preparing the papers that we need when we finally apply for our Canadian Visa.The list that I have is very long. Despite all of the things I have read & heard about how hard it is and how difficult it can get. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish that goal.

I also know stories of people who have been successful in Canada; however, I think the adjustments and the hardships that we will face once we get there are certainly true. I’m also aware that that there will be discrimination. (pero sa lahat ng lugar meron nyan)

Despite all of this, I still have a strong desire to migrate. I'm thankful that friends and family despite the encouragement never fail to tell me that there is another side of Canada, which is rarely known. In that way, I can be prepared for the worst.

What really gave me the courage to give it a go is the fact that we have a Special Child. I have heard great things about their programs with regards to Autism. I know that if that can help him maximize his full potential. Then that’s where we will go.

Saturday, August 21, 2004

Sorry kung tagalog.. Galing ako sa biyahe kaya pagod pa ako mag isip. Gusto ko lang sya isulat bago ko pa makalimutan.

Kakauwi ko lang galing sa lugar ng mga biyenan ko. Kakatatawa pa kasi yung asawa ko di umuwi.Ang dahilan ang computer nya.Na-addict sa Gunbound (PC GAME ).Sabi ko sa kanya baka sa dami ng lakad na di mo napuntahan dahil dyansa game na yan. Baka pag may nangyari sa yo walang dumamay sa yo at computer mo na langang nandyan.

Kami lang ng anak ko at ang kanyang butihing yaya ang umalis.Nagbyahe na lang kami kasi malapit lang naman (3 hours away)

Namatay ang pinsan ni Hon. Si E.M 27 years old, May kapansanan sya sa pagkakaalam ko based lang sa impormasyon na nakuha ko ay Autistic sya ayon lang ito sa mga symptomas na nakalap ko dahil sa pagsasaliksik ko. Takot na takot sila na bansag na yun. Mas gusto pa nilang tawagin na retarded sya. Ayon sa usap usapan tinangka daw sya ipa-abort nang nanay nya.Kasi tatlo na ang anak nyang babae na maliliit pa tapos nalaman nya na buntis na naman sya. Tinangka nyang inuman ng gamot nung walang nangyari. Tinuloy na lang nya. Laking pagsisisi nya nung malaman nyang lalaki pala ang naging anak nya. Dahil din sa pangyayari ito tumabang na ang pagsasama ng mag asawa. Di matanggap nung asawang lalaki ang ginawa ng kanyang kabyak.

Nung panahon na para sya ay mag aral di daw sya nagsasalita at parang di daw interesado mag aral di na nila pinilit pumasok sa eskuewala. Pinagpalagay na lang nila na epekto ng gamot kasi aminado naman yung nanay. Di na nila pinatignan sa doctor. Pinabayaan nalang na lumaki ng ganun. Di na sya talaga nagsalita..

Iba iba ang usapan kung ano ba talaga ang kinamatay nya.Sabi ng iba inatake daw sa puso. Tinanong ko kung bakit di nila alamkung maysakit sya sa puso. Ang sagot sa akin ay kasi di naman sya nagsasalita kaya di malaman kung ano ang masakit sa kanya.

(Naisip ko naman sana man lang napatignan maski isang beses para langmalaman kung may sakit ba sya sa puso at para malaman kung ano talagangkapansanang mental meron sya) Sabi naman ng iba ay baka daw binangungot sya at may ilanding nagsabi na baka talagang di na daw umaabot sa 30 ang lifespan ng isang Mentally Retarded.(natawa ako sa theory na ito kasi wala itong basis)

Nagulat na lang daw sila na bigla syang umungol ng malakasna tila ba nasasaktan. Tapos nangisay sya. Nung tinakbo sa hospital wala na sya.

Nalungkot ako nung pumunta ako nang burol nya.Dahil wala talagang may kilala sa kanya. Walang nagsayang ng oras para subukan naabutin sa mundong ginagalawan nya.

Habang nakikinig ako sa nanay nya ramdam ko ang magkahalong lungkot,panghihinayang, pagsisi at pag luluksa. Di ko lang masabi na sa lahat siguro dun isa ako sa lubos na nakakaramdam ng pinagdadaanan nyadahil Nanay ako at may special child. Damdam ko ang paghingi nya ng tawadnya sa anak nya.

Kaya kanina pinagsabihan na naman ako ng biyenan ko na wag mag alalala na di pa nagsasalita ang anak ko di ko na lang pinansin ang sinabi nya. Kung may malaki man akong natutunan sa pangyayaring yun ay Di ako dapat tumigil hanggat di ko naabot ang mundo ni Joshwa.

Kung kailangang pumasok ako dun at dun na lang kami gagawin ko. Gusto ko lagi nyang malaman na mayroon syang Nanay na gagawin ang lahat para sa kanya.

Gusto ko masabi ni Joshwa sa sarili nya na may boses ako at ang Nanay ko ang tutulong sa akin para masabi ko sa inyo yun.

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Michael Tan
Published on page A15 of the August 18, 2004 issue of the Philippine Daily Inquirer

A NOVEL where an autistic teenager solves the mystery of a neighbor's murdered poodle?
Why not? Mark Haddon's "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time" makes for a fascinating read as you "listen" to the mind of 15-year-old Christopher, while he unravels a crime involving a murdered dog.

Early in the novel, we realize that Christopher is autistic. His mind plays with numbers, and he loves maps and all kinds of trivial facts. He admits he doesn't like people too much and, no wonder, he has difficulties reading their facial expressions, and hates being touched. But note that he can't tell lies, not even a white lie.

The novel is fast-paced, something you can read on the plane as I did, but be careful because it goes in all sorts of directions as you try to keep up with Christopher's brain, processing the world in the peculiar way autistics do. His trip to London, done on his own, is especially gripping as he tries to figure out what train to take, and how to make his way to a particular address in the city.

Autisms and Asperger'sI'm not surprised Haddon's book is listed in several websites listing resources for families with autistic children. Haddon himself worked with autistics, and deftly drew on his experiences to write this novel. In the process, he reaches a much wider audience with a non-technical perspective on autisms.

I'm using the plural here because autism actually refers to a range of conditions. The term was first coined in Germany in 1912 by the Swiss psychiatrist Paul Bleuler: "autismus" derived from "auto," meaning self and "ismus," the state of. Autism is "the state of self," and was first used to refer to children who seemed caught in their own world, oblivious to their external environment.
In many societies, including our own, such children may be labeled as mentally retarded, and end up isolated and neglected. But the autistic are also often "fixated" on particular tasks, and will exhibit amazing skills in a specific field, such as math, music, painting.

As neurologists and psychiatrists saw more patients, they realized that autism took many variations. Some of the patients were very dependent on their families while others, so-called high-functioning autistics, could live on their own.

In 1944, a Viennese physician, Hans Asperger, published a paper about young boys who had normal intelligence and language development but who had autistic-like behaviors, such as being obsessed with certain routines, and having difficulty reading people's body language and emotions. As with the other autisms, the medical world later realized that Asperger's was more common than they thought, and that some of the people with this condition were very bright and become leaders in professions that require an almost obsessive concentration on particular tasks.

Nerds, geeks, malesIt's not surprising that there's speculation that Albert Einstein had Asperger's. Nerds and geeks may actually be "high-functioning" autistics or people with Asperger's. Note how very bright people will sometimes be very awkward with social skills (sometimes, in exasperation, we even call them "social morons"). Males, incidentally, outnumber females when it comes to autistics (who knows, maybe so-called male insensitivity may actually be a variation of Asperger's).

But we should certainly differentiate people with Asperger's from the mean, the vicious and the corrupt, those who have trapped themselves in dull and drab worlds of their own making, so completely differently from the fascinating and vibrant worlds of autistics and Aspergers.
Haddon's mystery novel allows us to peek into these special minds, while reminding us of how autisms are becoming so much a part of our lives. The psychiatrist Hans Asperger would be pleased, for example, to know his surname is now used rather commonly, as in, "Oh dear, I think I married an Asperger."

As we understand the spectrum of conditions here, we become more accepting, and understanding. Teaching in a university, I can tell you we have more than the regular share of Aspergers, and that this makes life in the academe both exciting ("What a genius. She must be an Asperger.") and exasperating ("Can't he just shut up and let others speak? He must be an Asperger.")

The writing professions, print journalism included, also probably has a greater share of Aspergers, given the way you need to collect and collate facts and images in your head and transform them into an article, essay or novel. Yes, maybe even columnists, especially those who write about the strangest topics, maybe Aspergers.

Disorders or variations?Easy now. I know some of you are getting nervous, the way Aspergers sound like Martians. I can imagine people in offices suddenly asking each other, as they look to a colleague, "Is he or isn't he?"

I do worry that the medical profession, by attaching labels, may inadvertently stigmatize these conditions. There are debates, for example, about what Asperger's really is, with all kinds of alternative labels proposed: Is it a form of high-functioning autism? Or a form of attention-deficit disorder?

The term "disorder" makes me uneasy. Certainly, there are many autistic individuals who need medical and social services, but the nerds and geeks will manage quite well, thank you. In fact, I often tell my students that if all humans were "sosyal," too busy making friends and socializing, humanity would still be stuck in caves. We needed the introverted nerds and geeks retreating into their own worlds to reflect, and to discover fire and invent the first tools.

I'd suggest that by moving away from psychiatric labels with its connotations of medical treatment, we might be in a better position to find social niches for the whole range of autisms. BBC had a news item a few weeks back about a Danish man who had put up a computer programming firm that mainly hired autistics because of the way they could concentrate. It turned out the man has an autistic son, who he hopes will eventually work in that firm.
That is a more dramatic case of carving out a social niche for an autistic child. For families with autistics and Aspergers, a more basic need is to simply pass on some social skills. There are now quite a few books and websites offering advice for families to help autistics function better in society.

Autistics and Aspergers, for example, may have difficulties working with people because they seem selfish and mean, running all over people's feelings with unreasonable demands and blunt remarks. This could be avoided if, in childhood, an Aspergers learns there's a world of people out there who also have their needs, and that they will need to take extra effort to "read" people's feelings. How is this done? Even being conscious about looking into the eyes of a child with Aspergers while communicating is said to be vitally important in teaching some of the basic social skills.

We still have a lot of learn about autistic conditions, and as we learn more, we might come to accept these conditions as part of the variations that make humanity so interesting.

Friday, August 13, 2004

Proud Mom
Im such a proud mom.. Joshwa learned a lot of new things this past few weeks. He can now do his OWN action of Twinkle,Twinkle, Skinny Marie & Itsie Bitsie Spider.Syempre pa kailangan may kumanta pa for him.Ako yun.. I knew my voice will be useful for something . (hahahah).
He can now do other tricks like wave bye, flying kiss, hug, kiss & bless. Some of you might be thinking why should I be so proud of something that seemed normal to other kids. That's because my son may not be normal but he is certainly special. He's Autistic.
It took us 2 years to get to where we are right now. This was a journey that I never thought I would take but still the journey isn't over. I know that the road is tough and I'll be there for him every step of the way.
Someone once asked me how I could handle the fact that he is special and that he may never be like other kids. I just gave them a straight answer. I'm his Mom there is nothing that I wouldn't do for him.

Thursday, August 12, 2004

Wifey Troubles

Had an argument with Hubby just now.I couldn't rely on him to help me with anything related to HTML. I wanted a new template for my blog and I've been looking at I found something that I liked. Now,I needed some help with the tweeking and to adjust the tagboard.He just refuses to help me. I told him that why can't he help me? He's good with these
things because of his background and he just looks at me and tells me that the blog is there its not his problem and its there for me to figure out. I've been trying to figure out this blog ever since I started to use it. Sorry for the ranting..Im just getting so frustrated that this blog is not looking like the way I envisioned it or the way its supposed to look like..

.. Aarrghh.. I rest my case.

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

Here's a good article on Secondary Infertility. I can relate to this article because I have it.
Secondary Infertility
Psyche Pascual

Finding out you're infertile can be agonizing, and reaching out to friends and family for support is natural. But when couples or individuals have had one child and face difficulties having another, they often get little or no sympathy from the people around them. This type of infertility is called secondary infertility, and it can be as painful as being unable to conceive a first child (primary infertility).

Even friendly queries from a relative or friend, like "When are you having another child?" can sting, especially when a couple has been trying for years to have one. If a couple does go through expensive fertility treatment, friends and family members may not understand the emotional and financial toll it can exact. Infertility support groups may not help because people dealing with secondary infertility may find that members are less understanding to anyone who already has a child.

It's no wonder that secondary infertility is considered an invisible dilemma, and that so many suffering from it feel shut out of the world around them.

The good news is that there are many options for people who want more children. Before fertility treatment, though, talk with your partner about how much you want or can afford. Depending on your prognosis and finances, you may eventually want to consider other options, such as adoption.

Thursday, August 05, 2004

An Article Involving A Mother and Her Autistic Son
(Breaktime Section by Ms Banal Philippine Daily Inquirer, July 31, 2004)

This one is for the books, and it happened at SM Megamall, the most popular mall of retail magnate Henry “Tatang” Sy, who is building malls over the country.
It seems that one day, a certain Ruby Javier went to Megamall at 12 noon to pay for her utilities at the SM customer service counter.
Aling Ruby always had to tow with her a 17 year-old special child, her son Francis, who has autism, diagnosed by doctors to have a mental capacity of a 6-yearold.
Francis, like most autistic children, had difficulty in expressing himself. He could hardly talk. But he is never violent.
That day at the mall, while Aling Ruby was doing her business at the SM Supermarket, she somehow lost sight of Francis. He drifted away somewhere at the mall unknown to the mother.
And it was the most harrowing 12 hours for Aling Ruby, trying to look for her son, without much help from the Megamall management, thank you.

A soon as she became aware that Francis was missing, Aling Ruby informed the Megamall security office.
Hours passed and still no action from the megamall security office, Aling Ruby was told to go to the police instead. The police asked her for photographs of the missing Francis.
But then the poor Aling Ruby was on her own looking for her son. After hours of searching and asking around the mall, she found out that Francis actually drifted to the area of the cinemas.

There, as it turned out, Francis tried to go into one of the theatres showing Harry Potter film. The security guard rough-housed Francis for trying to go in without paying.
As if it was not enough, the cinema security turned over Francis to the mall security. Without much ado, the mall security kicked Francis out of the mall. There – the problem solved.
The poor special child drifted outside in the streets for more than 15 hours. Call it mother’s instinct, but Aling Ruby was able to find her son seating outside another mall, several kilometers away from Megamall, at way past midnight.
I can only say this to the Megamall management: heaven help me in what I might do, should something like that happen to my godson, a nephew of mine, who has the same condition as Francis!

You guys there at Megamall have a problem!

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Treats for a sweet tooth, time-kissed pretty clothes, and happy feet
LOVE LUCY By Lucy GomezThe Philippine STAR 08/01/2004

You know how it is when you chance upon wonderful stuff just when you least expect to? Call them luck-kissed finds, karmic doodads, happy destinies – whatever title you blanket them under they are all the same in that they make for very happy smiles. This past week has been an overflow of such "good things", to quote Martha Stewart my favorite (in)famous celebrity, and I cannot wait for you to check them out yourselves. Here’s hoping you will enjoy (and yes, love) them as much as I have.

Cassava Bibingka – from a lady named Ping. Aside from having a sweet tooth I am also especially drawn to native kakanin. In Ormoc, there are a number of good cassava cakes, budbud, balanghoy – available at little cottage industries that have stood the test of time and change. Whenever my family visits, most especially my sister, they always hand-carry for me my hometown edible favorites. And now with this cassava bibingka that is easily just a text message away, I could not be happier. From today onwards, I will have no room for longing. Her cassava bibingka is delicious beyond words. The lady who makes it has had the recipe for a total of 20 years and despite the demand and the urgings of friends for her to sell it commercially she did not. But time has a way of pushing one in the right direction and she has finally given in to what she has deprived us of for so long and will now take orders (thank God!). Her goodies are a steal at only P250 for the small size and P450 for the larger one. And should you need to give them as gifts, they come very prettily packaged, too. Best eaten warm, although others may prefer it cold – either way, you are sure to love it. For orders, text or call Ping at 0917-6255123.

Brownies – from Roshan. And I thought I had already tasted all the good ones out there. This one, a definite must-try, will easily become a favorite. Guaranteed. Truth be told, Roshan is not a recent find (I have enjoyed her treats for over a year now) – but I discovered her by chance after Chechel, a friend of mine sent me some. She came to mind again earlier this week because a friend of mine and I were talking about the best places to order brownies from. Her brownies are consistently moist, with just the right amount of chocolatey sweetness and a taste that brings you back to some faintly-remembered home. I often enjoy it guiltlessly by dunking a whole brownie in a glass of full cream milk. As they absorb the milk, so too do they break down in huge chunks; only then do I spoon them out of the goop. Talk about melt-in-your-mouth goodness. Try it, this treat is perfect for a rainy day. Although the brownies can be eaten warm or cold, I prefer the former. For orders, call or text Roshan at 0917-8336286. By the way, she also makes to-die-for chocolate chip cookies and sylvannas. Her chocolate cake, no-fuss in its traditional goodness, comes with a generous amount of icing all over and in between.

Be sure to taste these three items, too. 27 ans – a clothing line available at Souk in Crecsent Building, San Miguel Avenue, Ortigas. I went there looking for something else and Heidi, who takes wonderful care of all Souk clients, led me to this rack of one-of-a-kind vintage pieces hand-picked and reworked by Tracie Anglo-Dizon. I met and worked with Tracie once for a Preview shoot but I haven’t seen her since. The beautiful pieces, maybe because of the patina of time, have a distinct, appealing old-world charm about them. They are just lovely and being draped in them almost transports you back to a time when being prettily dressed was as normal for a dinner out with your man as it was for a walk in the park. I especially fell in love with a pretty embroidered pink top, beribboned at the waist with a bright blue velvet ribbon (it was on reserve for someone else, boohoohoo), a white eyelet vest, also beribboned at the waist (it was way too big for me) and a blue knit sleeveless blouson reworked with paisley-print patches. Aside from being in very good condition, they are also one-of-a-kind so you can truly create a look that is all your own. I asked Heidi why the line is called 27 ans and she explained that apparently, anything over 27 years old (ans is French for years) is considered vintage. Don’t you just like the sound of that? It is enough reason for me to not only invest in good clothes but at the same time take care of and safe-keep them for Juliana (and her future sisters) to enjoy. On my next trip to Cebu, I cannot wait to raid the bauls in my maternal grandmother’s home. I’m sure there will be a treasure trove of vintage items waiting to be resurrected. Having 27 ans around easily beats having to go through piles and piles of dusty, vintage pieces that often abound in thrift stores. Another plus, they come tagged with very reasonable pricing, too.

Pretty Fit – Many thanks to Tim Yap, who invited me over to the store opening that he organized, I got wind of this pretty, pretty shoe store that is a franchise from Singapore. They carry a myriad of fashionable footwear, the styles and color of which remind me of eye candy. There is nothing boring about them; there available are glittery and bejeweled evening sandals, chic ballet flats with interesting details, patterned slip-ons for everyday wear that look anything but ordinary – and they carry up to a size 11! Even better is the fact that they are all very reasonably priced (starting at P1,000+ onwards). No wonder there was a mad clamor the day that they opened. Although I did not get a chance to really check out their men’s line, they do have a rack devoted to male footwear. With Pretty Fit now available locally, there is one more good reason to display a neat pedicure. Their shoes will surely make feet, well, nothing less than pretty. Pretty Fit is available at Glorietta 3, beside the Dockers store. Take the entrance by Tower Records for a faster way to get there.

Finally, have you tried the new Strawberries and Cream drink from Starbucks? It is just delightful. That and their Green Tea Frapuccino and I will love them forever. I am especially addicted to the latter, there was a time when I was enjoying it on a daily basis until I realized that I was enjoying it too much and not working it off enough. Now I limit my intake to times when I truly "deserve" to indulge in a glass – after a good dance workout or when it is raining really hard (which thankfully happens often enough nowadays). Talk about a sweet reward that I do not seem to tire of. You will understand why when you try it yourself. There you have it, you may be a tad thicker around the waist area after all the sweet treats, your money purse a bit less robust after a pair or two of shoes from Pretty Fit and a top from 27 ans but who can accuse you of not enjoying what is readily available and in the process grinning from ear to ear like a little girl at least once? Till next time, have a great Sunday!

Wednesday, July 28, 2004


Scrapbooking is my latest passion., "I started with my son’ s album which I never did finish because my sister did that for my son. Then I started to use some of my photos for my scrapbook. I didn’t have a theme of what I wanted I would just look at the photo and the papers that I have and then I’d just take off from there. In the five months since I started scrapbooking, I discovered some unexpected advantages. I like coming home in the evenings, the weekends, it's just a stress reliever. I just love sitting down and letting my creative juices flow .

I really think that scrapbooking is a great  hobby that can have therapeutic effects. Many people who enjoy scrapbooking say they reap other benefits besides pretty books. Some believe the cutting and creating actually make them feel better. It turns out, the experts agree. They say scrapbooking can be quite therapeutic. I think it helps people express themselves different ways through arts and crafts."

Just looking at the pictures can often bring a smile to my face. It's looking back at your photos and reliving those fun times that you've taken those pictures of."There's a sense of reminiscing. I would look at it and it would really help me to recollect happy memories of the past."

And to think that I never really thought I would be a good scrapper. I would be embarrassed to show my work to my friends. Til I realized I wasn’t doing this for other people. I was doing this for myself. That was when my whole attitude started to change. Now, I really do believe that the therapeutic benefits of scrapbooking today will translate into treasured keepsakes tomorrow. I think you can make your own memories that will last for generations. I can see our kids some day fighting over our albums. 

Tuesday, July 27, 2004


This day wasn't a good day. Think Murphy's law. I've been given a VERY HUGE dose of reality check about some things that I have been doing.. Because of this allow me to say MEA CULPA to the following people in my life:
My husband.. Im sorry because I know that I'm not the wife that you wanted. You wanted a picture perfect wife. Someone who looks good under a 120 LBS. Cooks great to boot. I know you think that I'll always be there. but I might not be.
My Son: Im sorry that Im not the perfect mom. That I scream at you when I think you're going to jump from out of nowhere. I'm sorry that I couldn't afford to bring you to the best doctors or send you to the best schools.
My Parents.. I'm sorry for not living up to your expectations..
My Sisters.. I'm sorry for not being the great example that I should be
My In-Laws: I'm sorry for not being the daughter in law that you wanted.
My Old Friends: I'm sorry for letting you down.. For thinking only of myself and not thinking of the consequences my actions. Although I thought my intentions were good.. Still..You trusted me and stayed with me in my lowest hours and yet I betrayed you and I let you down. No matter what I do I could never repay the kindness and acceptance you have shown me.I have tried to ask for forgiveness but I have failed because admitting it and accepting it may never be enough..I know in my heart, time may not be able to heal those wounds. Forget about me and move on. I'm not worthy of your anger.

Friday, July 23, 2004

Thibling Thurthday Q's

1.  Were you the youngest, the oldest, an "only", or a middle child?  How about your spouse?
==>>>Im the eldest in a family of 3 ( all girls) pero pag nakita nyo yung sisters ko parang ako ang bunso. Pandak kasi ako eh.. Saka sa itsura latak talaga ako.. Ironic nga lang kasi eldest ako.
+++>> Philbert is the youngest in a family of 3 (1 Guy, 1 girl and him)

2.  Growing up, did you share a bedroom or did you have your own room?
===>> I didn't have my own room
++++>> Philbert shared his room with his brother but when his brother went to college he stayed in his brother's room.

3.  Do you feel that you were treated equally as your sibilings (if you had any)?
===>>>No..I didn't.. My dad's favorite was my sister Grish(athletic kasi) and my mom's was the youngest Nets (malambing kasi eh)But while I was growing up I was attached to my Lola.. ( my maternal grandmother)
+++++>>> Philbert says for most part yes naman daw but ang favorite ng Nanay nila was his Kuya.

4.  If you were an only child, do you wish you had siblings?
===>>There was a time  that I wished that I was an only child.. hahahha baligtad..
5.a.  What were some of the advantages you experienced with regards to your position/birth order in the family?
===>>Pag may new toy ako mauuna pumili, may party lagi c/o my lola, I was lucky that since i'm the eldest I had the best ninangs   ,(who up to now is still in my life), lola's pet kasi ako ang eldest na apo nya, Mas maraming photos.
++++>> Mas lax na daw ang magulang ni Philbert. Di na sya masyado pinapagalitan.
5.b.  What were some of the disadvantges?
====>> Laging included sa bawat sermon na ATE ka dapat ikaw ang good example. Kaya i guess i sort of hated that kaya di kopinapakinggan sermon nyan.Saka kahit nag aaway kami sinasabi lagi dont fight back kasi Ate ka. Kaya I never did.Di na ako nagkaron ng chance to prove my authority. Kaya minsan maski sobra na ginagawa I just grin and smile.Kaya ata ganito ako eh,Because I was raised that way.So finally nainis na parents ko kasi di talaga ako maasahan. I was lazy and lax.Kaya ang  binigay na yung expectation sa sister ko.Another disadvantage since I tend to be goofing off A LOT no one in my family really took me seriously so I didnt take my self seriously either.
++++++>>> Si Philbert naman ang disadvantage lang is di sila magkasundo ng kuya nya because of the age gap.Saka laging sya ang  inuutusan.. Although di masyado ang expectations sa kanya ng parents nya. Medyo pressured sya sa mga achievements ng Kuya nya set by other people. Kaya ang resulta nagloko si Philbert nung college.
6.  What roles did your siblings have at your wedding?
===>> my sister Grish was the bridesmaid & my other sister Nets was the candle sponsor.
++++>> Sa side ni Philbert di sumali ang sister nya sa entourage kasi at that time di pa kami close and yung kuya nya nasa US na nakatira.
7.  What are some values your family instilled in you?
 ===>>> Leirs: always stick together, live within your means,
++++>> Philbert: Kaya nyong mabuhay ng walang utang.. Wag kakalimutan yung pinagmulan. 

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Heaven's Grocery Store
Written by: Ron DeMarco & Friend
I was walking down life's highwaya long time ago.
One day I saw a sign that read Heaven's Grocery Store.
As I got a little closer,the door came open wide,
And when I came to myself, I was standing inside.
I saw a host of angels; they were standing everywhere.
And one angel said," My child shop with care."
Everything a Christian needs was in the grocery store.
And all you couldn't carry you could come back the next day for more.
First I got some patience,love was in the same row.
Further down was understanding, you need that everywhere you go.
I got a box or two of wisdom, a bag or two of faith.
I just couldn't miss the Holy Ghost for He was all over the place.
I stopped to get some strength & courageto help me run the race.
But then my basket was getting full, but I remembered I needed some grace.
I didn't forget salvation for salvationwas free.
So, I tried to get enough of that to save you and me.
Then I started to the counter to pay my grocery bill.
For I thought I had everything to do my Masters will.

As I went up the aisle, I saw prayer andjust had to put that in.
For I knew when I stepped outside, I would run right into sin.

Peace and joy were plentiful, they were on the last shelf.
Song and praises were hanging nearso I just helped myself.

I asked, How much do I owe?He just smiled and said,
just take them everywhere you go.

Then I said, How much do I really owe?
He smiled and said, My child, Jesus paid your bill a long time ago. 

Friday, July 16, 2004

  Thursday Q's- Off To Work We Go!
1.What is your current job title? How about your spouse's?
My title is Admin Assistant - and Philbert  will be an Assistant Manager by Aug 1 (Yeah!!)

2.What kind of education and training/experience does this position require for your job?
I'm a sociology major.. which I didnt really get to practice because I started working for my dad.
3.What days/hours are you required to work? What about your spouse?
Leirs: Monday-Friday, 8.30am to 5pm Philbert: Monday-Friday, 8.30am to 5pm. But starting Aug 1 he can opt to come on work late say 10am and can still leave by 5 PM

4.What kind of benefits (if any) do you receive?
For my position, I have the following:- housing allowance- Therapy Allowance for Joshwa-all expense paid vacations- sick leave benefits-salary loans-Bonus

- For Philbert he has the following:- Insurance Plan ( parang pension)- health insurance -  vacation and sick leave benefits-laptop & cell phone- he can also opt to have a flexi-work schedule if he wishes to do so.-Bonus

5.Is this a vocation for a lifetime, or will you be moving on to biggerand better things? (However you want to define bigger and better ;)
i think so.. but my future goal is to work from the home and to be there for Joshwa.

 6.What is the best part of your job?
being able to watch tv, sleep on the couch, and do my scrapbook

7.What is your least favorite duty at your job?
when my dad gets mad..he gets really mad..another least favorite job is doing anything thats related to numbers.

8.If you have children, how did/do you manage working and caring for kids? If you plan to have children, how will you manage working and caring for kids.
I have a very reliable yaya who is always there to help me with Joshwa.

Thursday, July 15, 2004

The air was brisk with the morning sun rising slowly behind the windswept trees shrouded in a morning mist. I stood on the balcony wearing nothing but my bathrobe to ward off the mornings chill, calmly listening to the gentle pouring of the rain. A comforting change from the night before when the wind was foul, whipping and churning to a frenzy. Late in the night, a few hours before dawn, the storm had weakened and a peaceful calm had set in, leaving a chance to get some restful sleep. Today was my wedding day, finally Philbert and I would be man and wife.It would be the start of the rest of our lives.

Fast forward to today.. We've been married for 4 years.It wasn't easy but we're still together. Yes we have our fights but I take comfort in the fact that I know he loves me..There were many times that I had come close to saying its over..its too much work and not even worth it. But when I look at our wedding photos. I remember the promise of forever and commitment.. I will always remember the words of M. Scott Peck.
Love is not a feeling... It's a commitment and Alas.. Here I am still dreaming of our years to come..

Grishan ,Rescy,Me, Gandhi,Rhanesa, Brox

Rhanesa, Rescy,Me,Philbert,Gandhi,Grishan & Brox

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Jennifer Cuaycong

Sitting by my lonesome, in the middle of the night, in a darkened living room, I find great peace in the silence that surrounds me. Every now and then, when I feel the urge to unwind, I brew myself a cup of tea and sit alone in the living room. At two in the morning, everyone else is asleep in the house and I have my thoughts all to myself.

The house seems larger in the darkness. The pitter-patter of tiny raindrops hitting the roof and windowsills gives me great comfort. I am alone, but not lonely.

Having this luxury of time and space has given me ample time to reflect and think about the choices I've made in my life. Late at night, when you have nothing else left to think of, when the dishes have been washed, the laundry done, the kids put to bed, and your husband sleeps soundly amid the snores of little children, you find the sudden freedom exhilarating.

These nights of silence have ushered a time of change for me. Spring cleaning, I call it, a time to clean house and home, as well as body, mind, and spirit. It is a time to nurture and love the person in me, and to give back a little to myself after all these years of spreading myself too thin. Changing my consciousness, a little at a time, started with analyzing who I was and what my core values really were. Once I was really ready to live out my life the way I believed, it was time to start the cleaning.

This month, I clean up my heart.

They say that in our lifetime, our soul has the task to learn valuable lessons that will help it to grow to fulfillment as God's child. Many times, we fail to learn these lessons out of sheer stubbornness and intractability. Fortunately, we don't get to blow all our chances as life keeps presenting us with opportunities until we finally get it right. I never really understood this until a few weeks ago when, after a long night of introspection, I was overwhelmed by a sudden onslaught of sublimated emotions.

That night, as I sifted through a box of old pictures, I thought long and hard about the people who were extensions of my life. A sharp pain seared my heart as I unburied one picture hidden in the pile. It was a picture of better times, many years ago, when my friend and I called each other sisters.

She was special to me in a lot of ways. I took to her immediately, and as friendships go, I gave her my trust and complete faith. I thought I had hers as well.

And then one day, she suddenly stopped talking to me. I called her and she refused to speak with me. There was always someone, something -- anything -- in the way. For more than a month, I persisted and insisted that we talk, but she shut me out completely. I still remember that moment after the last phone call. It was the last time I tried to reach her. I sat stunned, bewildered, and overwhelmed with sadness.

I did not know what caused her to withdraw her friendship, and for many months, I was ignorant of the truth. Until one day, when someone close to both of us finally told me and I was shattered all over again. Was my friendship that insignificant to her? Were my words too worthless to be believed? I was judged and discarded without ever being heard. I felt betrayed.

From then on, I had to learn to live my life all over again, the knowledge of her emotional betrayal lurking in the fringes of a memory that I tried to ease out of my consciousness. I went on with my life, concentrated solely on the people who loved me -- my family -- and ignored the pain that throbbed still. I moved on.

Years passed in silence. Oh sure, I'd hear snippets of her life from other people, as I'd also hear what they say she said about me. They didn't bother me by then. She was so far removed from my life that I could remember only flashes of disjointed memories. By then, the pain had lost its sharp cutting edge and I could live happily with its dull, inconsistent twinge.

A phone call from her ended the standoff. When I heard her voice for the first time in years, that self-imposed dam of discipline cracked and a flood of unrecognized feelings broke through. I wept in unbridled grief and joy.

Yet, I should have known that things would never be the same after those years of separation. I was naive to believe that there was room in her life for me again, just as I made room in my life for her. Little by little, we found that we had very little in common with each other anymore.

All those years apart made us different from each other. She was a stranger to me, and perhaps I to her. Even as I'd like to believe that I had not changed too much, she was a total revelation to me. I did not know the person she had become.

Our values were no longer the same. She hankered for things I had no interest in. She did not hold the things I valued as sacred. And whereas once upon a time, we agreed on almost everything, this time, staying mum was all I could do to keep my tongue in check.

Perhaps she felt the same of me but I was too blind or too deaf to notice. There were times when I sensed a hardness in her, a new, bitter edge that cut deeply through scathing, disdainful or patronizing remarks. However, I shrugged them all off, hopeful that time will wear out the wariness and distrust and return the warm feelings of fellowship.

That day never came.

Our correspondence today is erratic and superficial, at best. Months will come and go and I will not hear from her, and then one day, a message will come just to say that she's busy with her life, ciao. I used to hold my breath and check my mail daily for the next word, the next line, the next chapter in her life. I got tired of waiting.

And so today, I say goodbye to this friend. We were sisters once upon a time, and I will always look back to those days with fondness. But today, she is a stranger and I refuse to let her in my life again. She will not hurt me again.

Sometimes, the kindest thing you can do to yourself is to acknowledge that not all relationships will work out the way you want them to. Once you find that a relationship eats at your soul and gnaws at your heart, it is time to let go. When spending time with this person leaves you unhappy about yourself, cut the toxic strings. When you find your thoughts and words constantly censored and stifled for fear of displeasing that person, turn away and say goodbye. It is time to prune your life.

This isn't easy for me. Some nights, I still harbor the illusion that my old friend is back, and she is once again the same person I met many years ago. I vacillate and think: what are a few years in the grand scheme of things? I can wait for her to return and be my friend again.

But as I sit here where I find the most peace, staring at the sleeping forms of my loved ones -- Anthony, Alexander, and Alphonse -- I realize that I am wasting my energy on someone who has been lost to me a long time ago. Right before my eyes, within my arms' reach, I have the ones who really matter with me still, and I cannot waste a single moment.

It is true, then, that no matter how many times you knock your head on the wall trying to right a wrong or trying to undo what's done, it won't happen unless it was meant to. And what is meant to be is this: that I stop living for people who do not matter and start finding peace, joy, and contentment with the ones who do.

Goodbye, my friend of long ago. I must stop traveling down the same road with you. But I shall always wish you well on your journey. Godspeed.

PINKY O. CUAYCONG is a homemaker who gave up a promising medical career to care for the three men in her life. To this day, her husband continues to pray she does not wake up from her stupor and wonder what the heck made her do such a thing.

Thursday, July 08, 2004

1.  What's the last CD you bought?
      counted ba yung blank cd?
2.  Where's your favorite place on your body to be massaged?
        - shoulders
3.  What time do you wake up in the morning?
- weekdays mga 7-7:30am
4.  What time do you normally go to bed?
- 12 midnight
5.  What's your favorite kitchen appliance?- microwave oven
6.  What makes you really angry?
- when Philbert plays deaf when he's at the computer & when I have PMS anything could set me off.

7.  If you could play an instrument, what would it be?
8.  If you have a tattoo, what is it?  Where is it?-
 none. i dont want one I have low threshold for pain.,
9.  Who's one person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to?
- I would probably say sorry to those people I have hurt. Maybe If I would even want to change my past and correct the mistakes so that my future could have been better.
 10.  What's in the trunk of your car?- we dont have a car :)

Thursday, July 01, 2004

1. Your three favorite websites (other than W@W)?
*  **

2. Know any triplets, besides Dols & Renan's cuties?
* nope .. but i wish i did..
Ever wish you were a twin/triplet?
* yup.. i've always wanted to have a twin.

3. Your three favorite accessories?*
 cellphone*  wedding ring* bags

4. Your three favorite beverages?
*iced tea  * coke* mango shake

5. Your three current favorite songs?
*A Little Bit* Burn*The Way You Look At Me

6. Last three things you ate?
* baked tahong * chicken ala king * chicken satay

7. How long did it take for you to graduate fromtricycle to bicycle? Who taught you?-
I didnt graduate..

8. Your three "hottest hottie" celebrities?-
Geoff Eigenmann, Jericho Rosales, Carlo Ledesma
9. Your three favorite hangouts?- my mom's house- the mall- san lo park

10. Your three favorite childhood hiding places (or favorite places)?
- my tita's house in Dipolog- in my tita's bedroom- in our bedroom

11. Is three your lucky number?- nope

12. Do you believe that bad things happen inthrees? How about good things?
- nope, good and bad things happen randomly and i know whether good orbad, they happen for a reason

Saturday, June 05, 2004

Joshwa: My Special Son

I think it's a blessing that my son's birthday is so close to Christmas Day. He’s the best Christmas gift that I have ever received. Having Joshwa taught us a lot of things like how to survive on four hours' sleep, the best ways to navigate through a tantrum, and how to make him eat vegetables. But I don't think I came face to face with the true range of what motherhood means to me until a surprising revelation came to me a few months month ago.

When Joshwa was 10 months old he had measles so I panicked and I took him to the pediatrician. While I was there at the doctors office I also asked the pediatrician is there something wrong with my son. Because he wouldn’t look at me when I call his name every time looked right into his face and he doesn’t seem to learning any of the tricks that I was teaching him. I always felt that something isn’t right. She quickly dismissed my fears saying that it was just normal no need to worry.

So I quickly rejected that thought because every time I would talk to my husband about it he’ll say that I’m too paranoid .I just filled myself with gratitude for the beautiful family that I have.

After 5 months I went back to the same doctor for Joshwa’s check up.I asked her the same question this time she gave me a different answer. Take your son to ENT (eyes , nose, throat) to have his hearing checked after that try to find a developmental pediatrician. Luckily I was able to find a developmental pediatrician on such a short notice. She gave me the grim news. Your son might have autism.

I knew nothing about Autism syndrome, but I had lots of frightening preconceptions. My first thought, was how can I help him. I kept blaming myself I felt such a failure I had dyscalulia and now I have passed something on to my son. I cried myself to sleep that night. When the tears dried, I began the long learning process that will continue, I imagine, for the rest of my life. Having resolved to find out everything I could, I went online, I read books, I talked to people. I was surprised to discover that everyone in the world, it seemed, knew or had an idea of what autism was. Everyone but me. I discovered an Internet support group for parents.. Our spirits soared. Friends and family had been very supportive, but, let's face it, they knew as much about Autism as we had. And they were all a little sad, too. But these other parents weren't sad at all. They felt that their children were a great gift, Autism or no.

As I pored over the books and talked with these other parents, I found the factual side of Autism fairly easy to piece together. No one really knows where it came from or what caused it according to studies Autism is a neurological disability most likely caused by immature development in the cerebellum & limbic system.

Of course, there was nothing in those reference books that could fully explain the other side of the story — the ups and downs of raising a child with Autism in our society. That's what we've been learning from Joshwa himself, and it's been a lesson filled with wonder. Joshwa’s life so far has been more complicated than other kid’s was. There are more ongoing appointments — he has therapy 5 times a week. There have been challenging days and frustrating moments as we've all struggled to learn about each other.

Joshwa is actually more like other kids than he is different. He will learn to walk, talk, read, sing, and dance, although he will have to work harder than most kids to reach those milestones. And we will have to slow down and allow him the extra time. Beyond that, he will have skills, talents, and quirks all his own. He already does. He can watch TV and not get distracted he knows when I’m angry and keeps quiet when I say no.

The future for people with Autism is brighter than it has ever been, which makes me hopeful for my son's adulthood. Early intervention, medical advances, inclusive schools that educate all kids together, and new therapies have meant that people with Autism can live longer, achieve more, and contribute to their communities in meaningful ways. Most of them graduate from high school, many live independently, marry, and have jobs.I dream about the possibilities. Will he love 80’s music the way his father does? Maybe he'll want to work as a Chef and run a restaurant , like what his my great grandmother does.

It has been only a short time since Joshwa came into our world. To a degree, we're still on an emotional roller coaster. We have days of unadulterated joy over our family and what Joshwa brings to us. Sometimes. Many days I feel guilty and unsure as to whether we're doing enough for Joshwa. Would he be better off if we could afford this program, those vitamins, or that new therapy? And sometime I get scared about what's down the road, especially when I think of the struggles he may face .

I've long since realized that our luck did not run out. Not at all. In many ways, our lives have been transformed. We have found loving support from people who used to be strangers. We look at the world differently and consider ourselves lucky to be able to. We have an appreciation for a slower pace, we take greater delight in each small step.