Wednesday, July 28, 2004


Scrapbooking is my latest passion., "I started with my son’ s album which I never did finish because my sister did that for my son. Then I started to use some of my photos for my scrapbook. I didn’t have a theme of what I wanted I would just look at the photo and the papers that I have and then I’d just take off from there. In the five months since I started scrapbooking, I discovered some unexpected advantages. I like coming home in the evenings, the weekends, it's just a stress reliever. I just love sitting down and letting my creative juices flow .

I really think that scrapbooking is a great  hobby that can have therapeutic effects. Many people who enjoy scrapbooking say they reap other benefits besides pretty books. Some believe the cutting and creating actually make them feel better. It turns out, the experts agree. They say scrapbooking can be quite therapeutic. I think it helps people express themselves different ways through arts and crafts."

Just looking at the pictures can often bring a smile to my face. It's looking back at your photos and reliving those fun times that you've taken those pictures of."There's a sense of reminiscing. I would look at it and it would really help me to recollect happy memories of the past."

And to think that I never really thought I would be a good scrapper. I would be embarrassed to show my work to my friends. Til I realized I wasn’t doing this for other people. I was doing this for myself. That was when my whole attitude started to change. Now, I really do believe that the therapeutic benefits of scrapbooking today will translate into treasured keepsakes tomorrow. I think you can make your own memories that will last for generations. I can see our kids some day fighting over our albums. 

Tuesday, July 27, 2004


This day wasn't a good day. Think Murphy's law. I've been given a VERY HUGE dose of reality check about some things that I have been doing.. Because of this allow me to say MEA CULPA to the following people in my life:
My husband.. Im sorry because I know that I'm not the wife that you wanted. You wanted a picture perfect wife. Someone who looks good under a 120 LBS. Cooks great to boot. I know you think that I'll always be there. but I might not be.
My Son: Im sorry that Im not the perfect mom. That I scream at you when I think you're going to jump from out of nowhere. I'm sorry that I couldn't afford to bring you to the best doctors or send you to the best schools.
My Parents.. I'm sorry for not living up to your expectations..
My Sisters.. I'm sorry for not being the great example that I should be
My In-Laws: I'm sorry for not being the daughter in law that you wanted.
My Old Friends: I'm sorry for letting you down.. For thinking only of myself and not thinking of the consequences my actions. Although I thought my intentions were good.. Still..You trusted me and stayed with me in my lowest hours and yet I betrayed you and I let you down. No matter what I do I could never repay the kindness and acceptance you have shown me.I have tried to ask for forgiveness but I have failed because admitting it and accepting it may never be enough..I know in my heart, time may not be able to heal those wounds. Forget about me and move on. I'm not worthy of your anger.

Friday, July 23, 2004

Thibling Thurthday Q's

1.  Were you the youngest, the oldest, an "only", or a middle child?  How about your spouse?
==>>>Im the eldest in a family of 3 ( all girls) pero pag nakita nyo yung sisters ko parang ako ang bunso. Pandak kasi ako eh.. Saka sa itsura latak talaga ako.. Ironic nga lang kasi eldest ako.
+++>> Philbert is the youngest in a family of 3 (1 Guy, 1 girl and him)

2.  Growing up, did you share a bedroom or did you have your own room?
===>> I didn't have my own room
++++>> Philbert shared his room with his brother but when his brother went to college he stayed in his brother's room.

3.  Do you feel that you were treated equally as your sibilings (if you had any)?
===>>>No..I didn't.. My dad's favorite was my sister Grish(athletic kasi) and my mom's was the youngest Nets (malambing kasi eh)But while I was growing up I was attached to my Lola.. ( my maternal grandmother)
+++++>>> Philbert says for most part yes naman daw but ang favorite ng Nanay nila was his Kuya.

4.  If you were an only child, do you wish you had siblings?
===>>There was a time  that I wished that I was an only child.. hahahha baligtad..
5.a.  What were some of the advantages you experienced with regards to your position/birth order in the family?
===>>Pag may new toy ako mauuna pumili, may party lagi c/o my lola, I was lucky that since i'm the eldest I had the best ninangs   ,(who up to now is still in my life), lola's pet kasi ako ang eldest na apo nya, Mas maraming photos.
++++>> Mas lax na daw ang magulang ni Philbert. Di na sya masyado pinapagalitan.
5.b.  What were some of the disadvantges?
====>> Laging included sa bawat sermon na ATE ka dapat ikaw ang good example. Kaya i guess i sort of hated that kaya di kopinapakinggan sermon nyan.Saka kahit nag aaway kami sinasabi lagi dont fight back kasi Ate ka. Kaya I never did.Di na ako nagkaron ng chance to prove my authority. Kaya minsan maski sobra na ginagawa I just grin and smile.Kaya ata ganito ako eh,Because I was raised that way.So finally nainis na parents ko kasi di talaga ako maasahan. I was lazy and lax.Kaya ang  binigay na yung expectation sa sister ko.Another disadvantage since I tend to be goofing off A LOT no one in my family really took me seriously so I didnt take my self seriously either.
++++++>>> Si Philbert naman ang disadvantage lang is di sila magkasundo ng kuya nya because of the age gap.Saka laging sya ang  inuutusan.. Although di masyado ang expectations sa kanya ng parents nya. Medyo pressured sya sa mga achievements ng Kuya nya set by other people. Kaya ang resulta nagloko si Philbert nung college.
6.  What roles did your siblings have at your wedding?
===>> my sister Grish was the bridesmaid & my other sister Nets was the candle sponsor.
++++>> Sa side ni Philbert di sumali ang sister nya sa entourage kasi at that time di pa kami close and yung kuya nya nasa US na nakatira.
7.  What are some values your family instilled in you?
 ===>>> Leirs: always stick together, live within your means,
++++>> Philbert: Kaya nyong mabuhay ng walang utang.. Wag kakalimutan yung pinagmulan. 

Wednesday, July 21, 2004

Heaven's Grocery Store
Written by: Ron DeMarco & Friend
I was walking down life's highwaya long time ago.
One day I saw a sign that read Heaven's Grocery Store.
As I got a little closer,the door came open wide,
And when I came to myself, I was standing inside.
I saw a host of angels; they were standing everywhere.
And one angel said," My child shop with care."
Everything a Christian needs was in the grocery store.
And all you couldn't carry you could come back the next day for more.
First I got some patience,love was in the same row.
Further down was understanding, you need that everywhere you go.
I got a box or two of wisdom, a bag or two of faith.
I just couldn't miss the Holy Ghost for He was all over the place.
I stopped to get some strength & courageto help me run the race.
But then my basket was getting full, but I remembered I needed some grace.
I didn't forget salvation for salvationwas free.
So, I tried to get enough of that to save you and me.
Then I started to the counter to pay my grocery bill.
For I thought I had everything to do my Masters will.

As I went up the aisle, I saw prayer andjust had to put that in.
For I knew when I stepped outside, I would run right into sin.

Peace and joy were plentiful, they were on the last shelf.
Song and praises were hanging nearso I just helped myself.

I asked, How much do I owe?He just smiled and said,
just take them everywhere you go.

Then I said, How much do I really owe?
He smiled and said, My child, Jesus paid your bill a long time ago. 

Friday, July 16, 2004

  Thursday Q's- Off To Work We Go!
1.What is your current job title? How about your spouse's?
My title is Admin Assistant - and Philbert  will be an Assistant Manager by Aug 1 (Yeah!!)

2.What kind of education and training/experience does this position require for your job?
I'm a sociology major.. which I didnt really get to practice because I started working for my dad.
3.What days/hours are you required to work? What about your spouse?
Leirs: Monday-Friday, 8.30am to 5pm Philbert: Monday-Friday, 8.30am to 5pm. But starting Aug 1 he can opt to come on work late say 10am and can still leave by 5 PM

4.What kind of benefits (if any) do you receive?
For my position, I have the following:- housing allowance- Therapy Allowance for Joshwa-all expense paid vacations- sick leave benefits-salary loans-Bonus

- For Philbert he has the following:- Insurance Plan ( parang pension)- health insurance -  vacation and sick leave benefits-laptop & cell phone- he can also opt to have a flexi-work schedule if he wishes to do so.-Bonus

5.Is this a vocation for a lifetime, or will you be moving on to biggerand better things? (However you want to define bigger and better ;)
i think so.. but my future goal is to work from the home and to be there for Joshwa.

 6.What is the best part of your job?
being able to watch tv, sleep on the couch, and do my scrapbook

7.What is your least favorite duty at your job?
when my dad gets mad..he gets really mad..another least favorite job is doing anything thats related to numbers.

8.If you have children, how did/do you manage working and caring for kids? If you plan to have children, how will you manage working and caring for kids.
I have a very reliable yaya who is always there to help me with Joshwa.

Thursday, July 15, 2004

The air was brisk with the morning sun rising slowly behind the windswept trees shrouded in a morning mist. I stood on the balcony wearing nothing but my bathrobe to ward off the mornings chill, calmly listening to the gentle pouring of the rain. A comforting change from the night before when the wind was foul, whipping and churning to a frenzy. Late in the night, a few hours before dawn, the storm had weakened and a peaceful calm had set in, leaving a chance to get some restful sleep. Today was my wedding day, finally Philbert and I would be man and wife.It would be the start of the rest of our lives.

Fast forward to today.. We've been married for 4 years.It wasn't easy but we're still together. Yes we have our fights but I take comfort in the fact that I know he loves me..There were many times that I had come close to saying its over..its too much work and not even worth it. But when I look at our wedding photos. I remember the promise of forever and commitment.. I will always remember the words of M. Scott Peck.
Love is not a feeling... It's a commitment and Alas.. Here I am still dreaming of our years to come..

Grishan ,Rescy,Me, Gandhi,Rhanesa, Brox

Rhanesa, Rescy,Me,Philbert,Gandhi,Grishan & Brox

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Jennifer Cuaycong

Sitting by my lonesome, in the middle of the night, in a darkened living room, I find great peace in the silence that surrounds me. Every now and then, when I feel the urge to unwind, I brew myself a cup of tea and sit alone in the living room. At two in the morning, everyone else is asleep in the house and I have my thoughts all to myself.

The house seems larger in the darkness. The pitter-patter of tiny raindrops hitting the roof and windowsills gives me great comfort. I am alone, but not lonely.

Having this luxury of time and space has given me ample time to reflect and think about the choices I've made in my life. Late at night, when you have nothing else left to think of, when the dishes have been washed, the laundry done, the kids put to bed, and your husband sleeps soundly amid the snores of little children, you find the sudden freedom exhilarating.

These nights of silence have ushered a time of change for me. Spring cleaning, I call it, a time to clean house and home, as well as body, mind, and spirit. It is a time to nurture and love the person in me, and to give back a little to myself after all these years of spreading myself too thin. Changing my consciousness, a little at a time, started with analyzing who I was and what my core values really were. Once I was really ready to live out my life the way I believed, it was time to start the cleaning.

This month, I clean up my heart.

They say that in our lifetime, our soul has the task to learn valuable lessons that will help it to grow to fulfillment as God's child. Many times, we fail to learn these lessons out of sheer stubbornness and intractability. Fortunately, we don't get to blow all our chances as life keeps presenting us with opportunities until we finally get it right. I never really understood this until a few weeks ago when, after a long night of introspection, I was overwhelmed by a sudden onslaught of sublimated emotions.

That night, as I sifted through a box of old pictures, I thought long and hard about the people who were extensions of my life. A sharp pain seared my heart as I unburied one picture hidden in the pile. It was a picture of better times, many years ago, when my friend and I called each other sisters.

She was special to me in a lot of ways. I took to her immediately, and as friendships go, I gave her my trust and complete faith. I thought I had hers as well.

And then one day, she suddenly stopped talking to me. I called her and she refused to speak with me. There was always someone, something -- anything -- in the way. For more than a month, I persisted and insisted that we talk, but she shut me out completely. I still remember that moment after the last phone call. It was the last time I tried to reach her. I sat stunned, bewildered, and overwhelmed with sadness.

I did not know what caused her to withdraw her friendship, and for many months, I was ignorant of the truth. Until one day, when someone close to both of us finally told me and I was shattered all over again. Was my friendship that insignificant to her? Were my words too worthless to be believed? I was judged and discarded without ever being heard. I felt betrayed.

From then on, I had to learn to live my life all over again, the knowledge of her emotional betrayal lurking in the fringes of a memory that I tried to ease out of my consciousness. I went on with my life, concentrated solely on the people who loved me -- my family -- and ignored the pain that throbbed still. I moved on.

Years passed in silence. Oh sure, I'd hear snippets of her life from other people, as I'd also hear what they say she said about me. They didn't bother me by then. She was so far removed from my life that I could remember only flashes of disjointed memories. By then, the pain had lost its sharp cutting edge and I could live happily with its dull, inconsistent twinge.

A phone call from her ended the standoff. When I heard her voice for the first time in years, that self-imposed dam of discipline cracked and a flood of unrecognized feelings broke through. I wept in unbridled grief and joy.

Yet, I should have known that things would never be the same after those years of separation. I was naive to believe that there was room in her life for me again, just as I made room in my life for her. Little by little, we found that we had very little in common with each other anymore.

All those years apart made us different from each other. She was a stranger to me, and perhaps I to her. Even as I'd like to believe that I had not changed too much, she was a total revelation to me. I did not know the person she had become.

Our values were no longer the same. She hankered for things I had no interest in. She did not hold the things I valued as sacred. And whereas once upon a time, we agreed on almost everything, this time, staying mum was all I could do to keep my tongue in check.

Perhaps she felt the same of me but I was too blind or too deaf to notice. There were times when I sensed a hardness in her, a new, bitter edge that cut deeply through scathing, disdainful or patronizing remarks. However, I shrugged them all off, hopeful that time will wear out the wariness and distrust and return the warm feelings of fellowship.

That day never came.

Our correspondence today is erratic and superficial, at best. Months will come and go and I will not hear from her, and then one day, a message will come just to say that she's busy with her life, ciao. I used to hold my breath and check my mail daily for the next word, the next line, the next chapter in her life. I got tired of waiting.

And so today, I say goodbye to this friend. We were sisters once upon a time, and I will always look back to those days with fondness. But today, she is a stranger and I refuse to let her in my life again. She will not hurt me again.

Sometimes, the kindest thing you can do to yourself is to acknowledge that not all relationships will work out the way you want them to. Once you find that a relationship eats at your soul and gnaws at your heart, it is time to let go. When spending time with this person leaves you unhappy about yourself, cut the toxic strings. When you find your thoughts and words constantly censored and stifled for fear of displeasing that person, turn away and say goodbye. It is time to prune your life.

This isn't easy for me. Some nights, I still harbor the illusion that my old friend is back, and she is once again the same person I met many years ago. I vacillate and think: what are a few years in the grand scheme of things? I can wait for her to return and be my friend again.

But as I sit here where I find the most peace, staring at the sleeping forms of my loved ones -- Anthony, Alexander, and Alphonse -- I realize that I am wasting my energy on someone who has been lost to me a long time ago. Right before my eyes, within my arms' reach, I have the ones who really matter with me still, and I cannot waste a single moment.

It is true, then, that no matter how many times you knock your head on the wall trying to right a wrong or trying to undo what's done, it won't happen unless it was meant to. And what is meant to be is this: that I stop living for people who do not matter and start finding peace, joy, and contentment with the ones who do.

Goodbye, my friend of long ago. I must stop traveling down the same road with you. But I shall always wish you well on your journey. Godspeed.

PINKY O. CUAYCONG is a homemaker who gave up a promising medical career to care for the three men in her life. To this day, her husband continues to pray she does not wake up from her stupor and wonder what the heck made her do such a thing.

Thursday, July 08, 2004

1.  What's the last CD you bought?
      counted ba yung blank cd?
2.  Where's your favorite place on your body to be massaged?
        - shoulders
3.  What time do you wake up in the morning?
- weekdays mga 7-7:30am
4.  What time do you normally go to bed?
- 12 midnight
5.  What's your favorite kitchen appliance?- microwave oven
6.  What makes you really angry?
- when Philbert plays deaf when he's at the computer & when I have PMS anything could set me off.

7.  If you could play an instrument, what would it be?
8.  If you have a tattoo, what is it?  Where is it?-
 none. i dont want one I have low threshold for pain.,
9.  Who's one person from your past you wish you could go back and talk to?
- I would probably say sorry to those people I have hurt. Maybe If I would even want to change my past and correct the mistakes so that my future could have been better.
 10.  What's in the trunk of your car?- we dont have a car :)

Thursday, July 01, 2004

1. Your three favorite websites (other than W@W)?
*  **

2. Know any triplets, besides Dols & Renan's cuties?
* nope .. but i wish i did..
Ever wish you were a twin/triplet?
* yup.. i've always wanted to have a twin.

3. Your three favorite accessories?*
 cellphone*  wedding ring* bags

4. Your three favorite beverages?
*iced tea  * coke* mango shake

5. Your three current favorite songs?
*A Little Bit* Burn*The Way You Look At Me

6. Last three things you ate?
* baked tahong * chicken ala king * chicken satay

7. How long did it take for you to graduate fromtricycle to bicycle? Who taught you?-
I didnt graduate..

8. Your three "hottest hottie" celebrities?-
Geoff Eigenmann, Jericho Rosales, Carlo Ledesma
9. Your three favorite hangouts?- my mom's house- the mall- san lo park

10. Your three favorite childhood hiding places (or favorite places)?
- my tita's house in Dipolog- in my tita's bedroom- in our bedroom

11. Is three your lucky number?- nope

12. Do you believe that bad things happen inthrees? How about good things?
- nope, good and bad things happen randomly and i know whether good orbad, they happen for a reason