Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Happy Birthday Philbert

Today is Philbert's birthday..
So to my love I say Happy Birthday we may
not be together now but we will be together
soon. You would always be 25 to me..
Since 25 ka forever does that mean
I'm forever 21 since you are 4 years older?

Here's a poem that I found by E.E. Cummings.


More than anyone on the earth and I like you
better than everything in the sky -sunlight
and singing welcome your coming.

Although winter may be everywhere,
With such a silence and such a darkness
No one can quite begin to guess (except my life)
the true time of year- And if what calls itself a world
should have.

The luck to hear such singing or glimpse such
Sunlight as will leap higher than high
Through gayer than gayest someone's heart
at your nearness.
Everyone certainly would(myMost beautiful darling)
believe in nothing but love

Monday, December 26, 2005

Joshwa and I celebrated Christmas together
but it was weird because It felt sad and cold.
Joshwa opened all of the gifts his and mine.
He had fun opening the gifts he had fun
with the wrapping paper and forgot about
the gifts all together. Here I was watching
him and taking a video and I was happy
to see him in a good mood and smiling for
the camera.

I spent Christmas with my Lola and some tito's,
tita's and cousins but still something was
missing. While I was eating and partaking
of the feast that is called Noce Buena.
Silently I was praying to God please I never
want to go through this kind of Christmas again.
I know that I should count my blessings etc and etc.

I wanted to get into christmas "spirit"
but still It felt weird that I couldn't.
I cant help it I miss my family .so what is family
anyway right? Joshwa is family but what I meant
was parents, my sisters,my nephew and most especially
my husband.

It was so sad and I felt pathetic
but I cant help it. But it's okay I know
that everything happens for a reason.
God will reveal it in time.. Not my time
but in his perfect time.

So for all of you who felt happy and
jolly and all sorts of happy emotions
this holiday season I say good for you.

For some of you that felt like I did
well then I feel for you and I sincerely
know what you're going through.

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Our Christmas Letter

Only twelve more days till
Christmas!Time just seems
to fly by these days.Last year
we were just getting ready for
a trip to the United States.

The past year had lots of ups
and downs for all of us. As we
reach the end of 2005, we are
well, thankful and anticipating
some changes in our lives.
This year we will be spending
Christmas with my Lola and
Tito Rekz and his family because
my parents will be spending
the holidays with Grish, Brox, Nets & Geoff
in the United States.

Joshwa is thriving so well he moved to a new school in
July and has shown some remarkable improvement.
He also started taking KUMON last November and it
has also shown positive feedback. The essence of the
Kumon Method is the curriculum of distinct skill
levels broken down into smaller blocks.
The materials span the entire spectrum from
preschool right through to university level.
Preschool and early primary students flourish
with progress through the levels in small,
manageable increments.
He can now arrange the number board from
1-30 and he is now starting to utter words.

On another note please include Joshwa in your
prayers we recently found out that he has to go
through an operation . Something is wrong with
his tongue the initial diagnosis is Ankyloglossia a
condition in which the free movement of the tongue
is restricted due to abnormal attachment of lingual
frenulum towards the tip of the tongue. The schedule
for the surgery is not yet fixed but were looking at
January. I’m positive that with prayers everything
will go smoothly as God is in control.

As for me I went back to school and I’m working
towards finishing my education units this year
and hopefully taking up my teacher’s certification
in August and then getting my Special Education
units by next year hopefully in that order.
I’m still very much into scrapbooking some of my
works can be found at:

Philbert is still in the United States working and
hopefully we will be reunited soon.
We both miss him so much.

Time is getting short, so I need to close this letter
and email it before it before the Christmas rush.
I hope to hear from you soon and don’t forget to
send email to tell us how the year was so far for
you and your family. Happy Holidays from our
family to yours.

Philbert, Leira & Joshwa Pagaspas

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Dami na akong experiences as far as dealing
with disabilities are concerned. Not with Joshwa but
with other people. (Philbert's family included)
Kesyo kasalanan ko kung bakit sya ganyan kasi
di ko sya kinakausap to excuse lang na special child
to not help them. But i took it all in stride kasi di
naman totoo yun.. Of course it doesnt help that others
can be insensitive as well.
(Others meaning those that I have met only a few times )
Comments such as Autistic pala anak mo di halata..
Iba kasi itsura nila eh.. The worse question asked was
"May ginawa ka ba nung buntis ka?"a worst comment
ever said to me that Autistics shouldn't be allowed
to mix with other kids. Aww.. di naman yan sakit
di yan nakakahawa. Anyway its all good because
I know not everyone will understand because they
all think that it won't happen to them.

I hope that it doesn't kasi what I went through
with Joshwa is something that i would never
wish on someone else. Kasi sobrang masakit
sa isang nanay na makita mo anak mo delayed
sya or nahihirapan sa isang task na simple lang
for other kids. Yung magkasakit ang anak mo
tapos di mo malaman kung anong gagamutin
kasi di masabi sa yo kung ano ang masakit.

The finances are no joke either.. Talagang mabigat
sa bulsa bukas school doesnt have a vacation.
The only time off that we get from school are
the legal holidays. The best part about being
a mom to Joshwa is I really get to appreciate
the simple things that he can do. I can laugh
and relish the little victories that he can do...